I'm not quite sure how to sum up today. All my plans were thwarted.
Jack played in a neighborhood fantasy football league, my neighbor came over and I went outside to talk to him. This year they are establishing a traveling Jordison trophy for the winner of this upcoming season. His name will be engraved in the trophy and will be passed on year after year for the winner. I had a hard time keeping it together, physically and vocally...it touched my heart.
Last night, Ben lost a tooth that he said was loose since the end of 2nd grade. Shortly after Jack died, Ben asked me if there was a Santa Claus...he's been on the cusp, mostly because of friends. The boy just lost his dad, he was with me, getting the phone for me, crying in the hallway.
I told him no. Santa isn't real or any other holiday friends. After that..why sugar coat.
Tonight, Ben asked me why he didn't get any money under his pillow..I'm like, cuz I just gave you a twenty to spend wisely...maybe I should have still been playing the game, he missed the tradition..let him stay a boy, even though he was given a dose of growing up way too fast. I will find something to put under his pillow tonight..doesn't matter that he's next to me in bed. We will eventually find our way.
No comments:
Post a Comment