...I shall write now. 9 months after Ben was born, I started experiencing dizzy moments. They were very frightful. I went to the doctor, had tests, getting treated for high blood pressure...hence, no siblings. Ever since then, I've had a doctor phobia. In my current mind, I want to protect Ben from my own pain of losing my father and to the current pain he hasn't shared with me about losing his dad. Please, don't think this is wacky, I get I should do everything possible for my health...because of Ben. It's his fear, if something comes up, that scares me the most...makes me cancel appointments.
I just love him too much, to scare him. I know it's the wrong attitude.
I go to the doctor on Wednesday...God give me strength not to cancel.
Did you cancel?! :-)
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