...getting grounded

Dealing with demons isn't a fun gig, Thank God for Moms, who finally get you back on a path. Our family needs closure on Jack's ashes. There are two sets, one to bury and one to spread.  My mom thinks it's time to do it, I agreed with her..but how easy is it to forget... to think about it. She will be in town this week-end for my nieces first communion and wants me to set up a meeting. Ben is at an overnight Boy Scout camp out, yet has a baseball game Sat. at 9am.I have a scout's dad coming back into town, early, with the boys. Do I go to the game for Ben or go find a burial site for Jack?...angst.

...a voice

other than little people. Tonight, I want to thank any adult for a moment of their evenings...it made me feel sane:)

...unfortunate series of events

I would like a re-do. Had to be a part of 911 coming down my street in front of my house. Ben wasn't home at the time, but I ran outside to find one of Ben's besties choking on a gobstopper that got lodged in his throat. I kept hearing weird noises, peeked outside and saw my neighbor giving the heimlich to a 13yr old. I freaked the freak. My neighbor was awesome, I contacted his mom and all said in done it was a happy ending...until I stepped foot in my house. I just broke down and cried. Ben's friend never lost breathing, so we knew he would be okay. I just relived the worst morning of my life. 911, cops, answering questions, legs going numb, body in shock. I'm so thankful Ben wasn't home, cuz, once again I would have failed him...by not being with him when he needed me the most. I hugged him tight before bed.

...inner peace

My friend shared the most comforting song on Facebook last night. I think I've listened to it 5 times already. It truly made me feel His comfort..it gives me peace. It's my new bedtime nightly song. Thank-you Sara and thank-you God:)  On another note, nailbiter of a baseball game, we lost by 1. Big Ben was the opening pitcher, very rusty, but held his own. TGIF, my friends.

The Fray - Be Still (Lyrics)

...new steps

I took Jack's wedding band off my right hand this morning...it feels ok.

Happiness